I am done being down, I have snapped out of it.
Things are good, it is so beautiful here, I love sleeping outside. After an unfortunate bed bug incident (very, VERY unpleasant) I have moved out of my tepee and into the best pagoda on the property. It is a platform of dark, hard wood raised about four feet off the ground, with a roof and drop down shades on the sides. This morning I woke with a unobstructed view of the sun rising above the mountain, and the breeze blowing through the thatch. I laid in bed for a little while, warm in my blankets, soft on my sheets, thinking about how fortunate I am and how many different directions my life could have taken. I thought a lot about time that I waste, time spent distracting myself rather than experiencing, the countless hours of watching shitty TV or reading trashy books instead of really living. I have no excuses now. I have survived heartbreak and the end of the tunnel is indeed near, and it is time to stop mourning and start living again. Thank god, I was getting sick of being bummed out.
I leave in five days. I didn't think that I would ever leave this place but I am having the urge to go home to Olympia and during these last few years of traveling I have learned not to ignore these kind of impulses. NYC next weekend, the big city with lots of friends, still need to buy my ticket back to Seattle. The east coast for who knows how long, but ultimately home sweet home to see all of my friends and family. I love summers in the North West! Sweet smelling trees and green green grass, swimming in the river, BBQs at Burfoot, sticky hot nights, watching the sunset at 10pm, fruit missions to Eastern WA and everything else about it.
So many trips planned this summer. I want to spend a week in the Enchantments and the Stuarts. I want to drive to Mexico, hugging the coast except when there are mountains to explore nearby. I want to live the life I have always wanted, footloose and fancy free with nothing to hold me back or tie me down, and I want to do it with a smile on my face.
Good vibes this morning. Cup of ginger tea and the wind howling through the pines and the world is mine for the taking.
