Two and a half days into the Atlantic Ocean aboard SY Riela. It is a beautiful 57 meter Perini Navi sailboat, with 10 crew (myself included) and four guests, and we have been flying along at 15 knots. This crossing is so different then the one I did six months ago aboard Kings Ransom, every single part of it feels, well different! This time I had only 12 hours to get from St.Maarten to Antigua and move on board before we left, however there was none of the panic and nerves that I had before. I sit up in the fly bridge and stare at the horizon and laugh and joke with the rest of the crew, and the thoughts of isolation and fear of being so far from land never even cross my mind.
Everyone laughed at me yesterday, when in the middle of dinner I casually asked where we were actually going. No one can believe that I could get on a boat with no idea where it was heading! I feel adrift in more ways than one right now. My life has completely changed, all of the security and love that I had for years has ended and I am now entirely on my own. But, instead of being scared of being alone and apprehensive of what the future may hold, I am excited. So very sad, at the loss of my life with him and everything that went along with it, but looking forward to being completely emotionally independent relying on no one but myself for ultimate refuge.
I hit the jackpot with this crossing. On a random, metaphysical note I think that it is amazing that I asked the universe for help, and this is what it delivered. I needed a catalyst to propel me forward into my new life, I didn’t have the strength to leave it all behind myself, and I got what I asked for! A new boat paying me more than I have ever made in yachting (and in Euros too!!!), a few weeks with nothing but water to stare at to give me time to gather my courage and collect my thoughts, and then the Med, and whatever life brings there.
We’ll see what happens.
Everyone laughed at me yesterday, when in the middle of dinner I casually asked where we were actually going. No one can believe that I could get on a boat with no idea where it was heading! I feel adrift in more ways than one right now. My life has completely changed, all of the security and love that I had for years has ended and I am now entirely on my own. But, instead of being scared of being alone and apprehensive of what the future may hold, I am excited. So very sad, at the loss of my life with him and everything that went along with it, but looking forward to being completely emotionally independent relying on no one but myself for ultimate refuge.
I hit the jackpot with this crossing. On a random, metaphysical note I think that it is amazing that I asked the universe for help, and this is what it delivered. I needed a catalyst to propel me forward into my new life, I didn’t have the strength to leave it all behind myself, and I got what I asked for! A new boat paying me more than I have ever made in yachting (and in Euros too!!!), a few weeks with nothing but water to stare at to give me time to gather my courage and collect my thoughts, and then the Med, and whatever life brings there.
We’ll see what happens.
